InCas_ of Emergency

Yesterday I got an automated email from LiveJournal congratulating me on the "achievement" of my LiveJournal's 20th anniversary. Turns out that TODAY is the anniversary. My first entry was September 2, 2005! So I figured I would write a commemorative post.

Yes, I still have my LiveJournal up on their site and have NOT deleted it like I said I would (probably should). While I have posted exclusively on Dreamwidth since March 2018, I did port over everything I had written on my LJ before then and consider my Dreamwidth journal a continuation of that LJ that I started...20 years ago??

I know the phrase has become cliche, but it's hard to believe it's been 20 years since I started this journal. At the same time it feels so long ago because my life was so much different back then. I was working at the public library in my hometown and was looking to apply to library school. For a long time, I used this LJ to meaningfully connect with my friends. We would write entries, sharing what was going on in our lives and we would respond to each other's posts with thoughtful comments. None of this "thumbs up" button...!

I really love having this Dreamwidth journal and continuing to write on it...even if it's very seldom. But honestly, with pretty much all my friends having long abandoned their journals, it's not the same. We have succumbed to the social media platform and trying to go against that is like trying to swim against a whitewater current. I have written about my frustrations with the Peach platform but at this point, the connections I've made on Peach are the closest thing to the connections I created in the early years of my LiveJournal.

Personally, so much has changed: I was so excited and optimistic about the career I was embarking on and now I feel so burnt out. But as I write this, I am reminded to be grateful that I made something of myself and got out of my hometown. I embarked on not just a career but a whole new life in Pittsburgh that I love. I will always treasure the many entries in that first year or two that detailed all the adventures in moving to Pittsburgh and going to grad school.

20 years later I feel so tired but outside of work, I love my life. I just need to figure out the career stuff (or just stagnate and moulder in this job...I guess either one). Either way, I want to remain motivated and optimistic.

So on Friday I got in touch with the person who organizes the class. She told me that no one had signed up for the ceramics class so it was being cancelled as well. She offered me a spot in a tapestry class being held on Saturday but 1) I had no interest and 2) I already had plans, so she basically said to let her know if there was a class I wanted to take in the future. I felt a bit uneasy about this informal arrangement but I figured that there was a text trail to remind her of it if necessary.

Well, later in the afternoon I get a text from her letting me know that two people had signed up for the ceramics class at the last minute so it was still on. I was exhausted at the end of the work day, but I went to the class anyway. Turned out that only one other person besides me showed up, but this person was very friendly so I had a good time talking to them. In previous classes with this instructor, I got to make mugs, and I got to make plates. But for this class, we got to make planters. This was my 3rd class with the instructor and I hoped she didn't think it weird, but before long I felt at ease with the three of us chatting. It was past 10 pm by the time I got home and I was super tired, but in a good way, because I felt accomplished and because the next day was Saturday so I could sleep in.

On Saturday, R and I went to our friend's house for an early Fall Equinox celebration in which our friend burns a bunch of dried sage in his fire pit. His parties can get pretty big and noisy but this was a chill affair.

Yesterday (Sunday), I went to the Polish Hill Arts Fest for the first time in a few years. I wouldn't have known about it if another friend at the hadn't mentioned it. The arts fest was smaller than I have remembered it to be in years past, but what I like about it is that the vendors aren't usually the ones you find at every other market/fair in the the city. There's a bit of a "punk" vibe to it and in years past, there would be groups of "gutter punks" who would hang out at the event. I've always liked the Polish Hill neighborhood (just as the name suggests, it was a neighborhood inhabited mostly by Polish immigrants) and always feel relaxed when I'm there.

Afterwards, I drove to Oakland, where R and his friend Sam were busking on a street corner, where Sam's friend, who owns a local bookstore, had a table set up with books for sale. As always, it was nice to hang out and listen to their music. But the highlight was getting boba tea at a nearby boba tea place. I got a black tea/oatmilk/brown sugar concoction. I think part of the reason I liked it so much was because I was just really thirsty. But another part of me is saying, "I *must* go back..."

1) If you want to read my "Where were you on 9/11?" story, which I wrote on the 5th anniversary of 9/11, you can read it here.

2) At this point, I'm accumulating pouches the way I was accumulating notebooks several years ago.

3) I remember learning about people who would play podcasts at 2X or 2.5X speed in order to "binge" podcast content. I thought it despicable and sad that people would do that, but then I found myself doing that very thing to get through 1-2 hour Ted Lasso recap podcast episodes.

4) I went and signed up for a woodworking class tomorrow. I'll be building a triangle-shaped shelf. It's a bit awkward because my husband has a whole woodworking workshop in the garage. I love him but...I need someone else to teach me the basics and no, I am not planning on making woodworking my hobby...I just want to build a cool-looking shelf. Anyway, when I told him, he seemed to understand and told me I should let him know how we construct the shelf in class so he can try making one himself.

So today I had two good ideas for topics to write about. One would (maybe) be short and sweet and the other one more involved. Unfortunately, I forgot the topic of the short and sweet one. I could start writing about the more involved one but it's time for dinner soon.

I woke up this morning and since it's Saturday, I was leisurely eating breakfast and browsing the Internet between 8:45 and 9am. My mind flashed back to the moment almost exactly 20 years ago: in my dorm room, getting ready for class, a quick check of the news on the Internet (via my heavy desktop computer) and not seeing anything of interest to me, unaware of what was going on.

I didn't have a television in my dorm room, but I had proudly installed a "TV card" on my computer that allowed me to watch TV on my computer. This is how I followed the news on that day and in the days following the September 11th attacks.

This morning, after cleaning up and getting dressed, I looked down at my smartwatch. Could the me of 20 years ago have imagined I would be looking at a computerized watch 20 years later...or a computerized phone? Could we of 20 years ago have imagined all of what was to come?

There are many for whom this day does not stop being painful, for many, many reasons.

Already there is a generation of people who were born after or were too young to remember 9/11. I imagine that as the years go by, there will be fewer and fewer of us who remember that day.

For more detailed recollections of that day, read the post I wrote exactly 15 years ago.

I first heard of Rae Dunn when about two months ago, when my dad sent me a link to an article about Rae Dunn pottery. ( The Rae Dunn Craze )

It reminded me a LOT of my experience with the Field Notes brand. ( How Field Notes compares to Rae Dunn )

It was an obsession that could have easily become an addiction for me.

And in case anyone thinks these obsessions with brands are something that happens to only women: there were both men and women among the collectors of Field Notes, and the majority seemed to be men. So it shows that this kind of obsessive behavior is also apparent in men. Besides, anyone heard of Supreme?

So needless to say I had no interest in buying any Rae Dunn products.

So fast forward to this past Memorial Day weekend when R and I rented a house in WV with some friends. The rental house had a fully equipped kitchen and in one of the cupboards were two Rae Dunn mugs. One said "Relax" and the other "Enjoy." I totally did NOT expect to be seeing Rae Dunn products in person. Nevertheless I found it rather amusing to see them. It wasn't until our last day there that I drank some tea from one of the mugs. The mugs were large and had uneven yet smooth edges. And surprisingly...they felt really good to hold and to sip from. I decided right then and there that I would go to TJ Maxx and buy a Rae Dunn mug with words that hopefully weren't too cringeworthy.

( My experience buying a Rae Dunn mug )...I'm really happy with what I got. I daresay...the mug sparks joy (at least for now).

And since my mug purchase, I can see how one can easily get sucked into the RD craze (or any brand craze for that matter). ( My take on Rae Dunn and why people get obsessed with a brand )

I admit, I think my Rae Dunn mug is pretty cute and I really like it. But I realize that all Rae Dunn mugs are basically the same mug, but with different things written on them. Buying more of them would not make me enjoy these mugs better. Besides, I don't have room in my house for extra china cabinets...let alone a lot of mugs! And if I were surrounded by a wall of Rae Dunn ceramics, they would stop being cute. I prefer a variety of dishware and kitchenware.

Anyway, that's my rambling meditation on Rae Dunn, brand obsessions, and shopping addictions. And well...That's All, Yolks!

....I'll see myself out ;-)

I've loved photography as a hobby most of my life. But recently, in my slow-going efforts to declutter and minimize my things, I've started to re-examine my relationship to photography and what photography means to me.

There are two things I did this weekend that have helped me clarify things about how I approach photography. The first thing was going through my old college photos and the second thing was going to an exhibit of Frida Kahlo's collection of photographs.

So one of the things I brought back with me from my mom's house was two boxes full of photo prints. I wanted to go through them and decide which ones to keep and which ones to donate to the Pittsburgh Center for Creative Reuse. Turns out that they were almost all the pictures I had taken during my college years. There were a TON of landscape pictures and pictures of flowers, etc. that I put in the donate pile. Many of those pictures were well taken but...flowers and clouds looked the same in 2000 as they do today in 2021. To be frank, those pictures were boring. But the true learning experience was what I decided to keep. What I kept were pictures of people that are still very important in my life, of course, but also of people who I never saw again after college, but I remember very fondly. I tried to keep pictures of things that were indicative of the time the picture was taken or pictures of rooms and dorms where I stayed in that bring up a lot of memories. I kept a lot of pictures from my time in Kobe in 2000. A lot of the people in the pictures I never saw again after college but I have such fond memories of the experiences I shared with them in Japan.

Then today, I went to an exhibit at The Frick of pictures of Frida Kahlo and the people in her life, taken from her photograph collection that was discovered in her home (which is now a museum dedicated to her art) a few years ago. The photographs chronicled all the various aspects of her life, especially her relationship with Diego Rivera. The text accompanying the photos discuss the themes behind what she chose to keep/collect. According to the text, she kept photographs as a way to feel connected to the people she loved in times of isolation due to her health. She kept photographs that alluded to the good times in her life as well as the painful times in her life. The exhibit really spoke to me, especially on the value of photography as a tool to chronicle one's life (and times) and the power of photography to evoke memories. Photography for the sake of documenting as opposed to photography for the sake of art (Frida's art, for one, lay outside photography).

I guess what I want to say is that I hope these two experiences this weekend can guide the way I approach my photography in the future. But it is easier said than done. It is so tempting to take a picture of every beautiful thing you see (especially now that it's spring!), but sometimes those things are best experienced "in the moment." Unlike photographs of people, you may be able to capture the image, but you can't capture the unique moment in which you took in the sight or the feelings it evoked in you.

So...I'm waiting for an MS Office update to install and trying to avoid websites that sell things so here I am.

My No-Buy April has been going well. I've been able to avoid buying unnecessary things but boy have I've been tempted a LOT. It has made me deal with those super-uncomfortable feelings and thoughts I get around not buying something that seems urgent at the moment. And sometimes those feelings are STRONG.

For example, last Saturday R and I went to an outdoor brunch get-together. It had been a while since I had been able to socialize with a group of people and...it felt great! I got talking to this one person who I hadn't seen in over a year and was really enjoying the conversation. I was really having a great time. Then I noticed that she was wearing this hoodie with a cute palm print on it. I asked her where she got it and she told me. After I got home, I went to the website and I just had this URGE to buy it. Had it not been for No-Buy April, I would have bought it right away. But no, I had to deal with that painful feeling of not getting it. My thought was: "This will be the *perfect* hoodie...just what you've been looking for! It's such a fun print! It'll liven up your plain wardrobe." So it got me thinking what it was that made me want that hoodie. And I think it's that I associated that hoodie with the good time I was having socializing and being out in the warm weather. The person who was wearing it has a fun personality and I guess I felt that wearing the hoodie would make me like her.

There are a bunch of other things that I've come across that I've gotten the urge to buy...

Anyway, the update is complete...that's all for now!

So I got a year-long subscription to Flickr Pro. I’m using it as a way to store my photos now that my employer-sponsored Box account is being phased out in favor of Microsoft Drive. I had been using Box to store my app-based photos, my digital toy camera photos, and my film scans.

As much as people were pissed off that Flickr Pro prices increased recently (not to mention the free unlimited/1 TB? storage was pulled from under us!), it’s still a pretty good deal compared to other comparable services. There truly aren’t a lot of choices when it comes to photo storage and sharing. I considered iCloud Photos but it has limited functionality and it’s not very strong on the sharing part. I’m already using it as backup for my iPhone photos so I may use it as secondary storage for the hobby/artsy photos I’ll be posting to Flickr.

Which reminds me... I probably should get a paid Dreamwidth account, huh?

It’s a nice day and yet again, I feel unmotivated to do anything except lay on the couch. The problem with the weather is that it’s 62 degrees outside, which is too warm to turn on the heating, so the house gets a bit chilly and I struggle to stay warm. It’s during days like these that the interiors of cars become nice and cozy due to soaking up heat from the sun. I’m looking out the window at my car and it’s looking *really* tempting.